Writing Zazen

Monday, 13 August 2007

Silence and Waiting

Filed under: Warrior Woman Says — Silent Warrior @ 7:15 pm

Monday 13Aug07 7:54pm

It’s hard sometimes to sit through the silence. That period when the writing isn’t coming the way it should be and you need to take a break from it. How do you differentiate between laziness and lack of motivation and the writers silence of stuff percolating inside before it explodes out onto the page?

I’ve been writing. I write pretty much everyday. But I’ve felt stopped with my novel. I haven’t been able to tell if it was just me feeling lazy or if I actually needed to let things sit in my mind before it all came out the way it was supposed to.

A few days ago I wrote on my other blogs about the feeling that I needed to hibernate and how it’s hit me so early in the year. It usually falls in line with the cold weather. I wrote about how definite ideas are coming clear to me. Like I have to give up watching television and I need to give myself permission to be less sociable without guilt. I said that I felt that I’m at the edge, where I have to ask myself what am I willing to give up in order to realize my dreams.

I promised myself that I would sit down for the new moon (yesterday) and write up the next set of things that I needed to focus on, write up the distractions I needed to sweep out of my life. I needed to make changes once again. That cycle always comes up, the need to make changes.

I set up the piles of books around my apartment that I want to have close by because I knew that when the time came, I’d be grabbing at them. I got home from work today and didn’t turn on the television and I didn’t get distracted with all the little things that normally bog me down. I sat at my desk and I wrote with the goal to just cleanse my mind and from there wrote a memory for one of my novel characters and didn’t stop until I easily hit my 1000 words. I wrote up the continuing line that will run through all three novels. Two months ago, I wrote the questions that the two main characters will attempt to answer throughout the novels. Between that and tonight’s writings, I feel ready to go back over the chapters and rewrite them and shape them with the questions in mind and the continuing line running through them.

And when I was done my thousand words, I pulled out more paper to have my writing conversation with my alter ego, Warrior Woman. She reminded me that when I take the pressure off and make my writing more about play and writing for the sake of writing, I relax enough to get at what it is I want to say. “When you play and make it fun and keep going forward you see how quickly you can fill up the pages with words. How quickly the ideas come together, how time has no meaning.”

She repeated what I’ve been saying to myself lately, “change your thoughts, change your mind.” Which is the title of Wayne Dyer’s latest book, a book I want to get, and something he’s been saying for at least his last couple books.

And she reminded me that every day is a step forward.

I picked up The Power of Intention off one of my piles of books to start over again and in the preface came across this perfectly appropriate quote:
“Anything we can conceive of in our minds — while staying in harmony with the universal all-creating source — can and must come to pass.”

SW

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